terrible one's (no longer terrible two's)?

i got an email the other day about our baby's development (i'm on several email lists telling me about what to expect about moses), and this is what it said:

Expect mealtime messes, new words (like "NO!"), squirmy diaper changes, and mood swings. (In case you haven't heard, one is the new two.) 

i can definitely see most of these things happening, but it was the end of the statement that really stood out to me.  i wondered if this was true, and after mulling it over for a time and paying careful attention to mo's behavior, i decided it must be true.  yesterday, even, i witnessed what can only have been called a one-year-old-sized tantrum.  what had happened was... we try to teach the little guy not to chew on his books.  he tried to do that last night, so i took the book away, and he started on a really ugly cry.  complete with tears and everything.  i just sat through it.  i didn't console him.  i didn't reward him by giving the book back to him.  i just sat through it.  it was really uncomfortable.  then i shifted him into the bath, and he eventually quieted down on his own.

i began to wonder if people in other countries have something similar to the "terrible two's" and temper tantrums.  maybe i just blocked it out, but really, i feel like i can't remember any fellow kids in my old [Korean] church having temper tantrums.  what i do remember is adults who would not stand for misbehavior.  kids never won.  parents always ruled.  it was what kept us young kids in line when we were unsupervised for hours at a time while the parents had revivals all night long.

it makes me wonder if America, the land of instant gratification, convenience, and honey boo boo child, is the main ingredient in this phenomenon.  i wonder if we, as Americans, fear being in charge/taking responsibility, really disciplining our kids, and persevering through children's disapproval of our decisions (within reason).  maybe we even quietly judge such parenting because we believe children (especially really young ones) should [above all else] be happy, and children don't act happy if we decide and enforce what is appropriate behavior.  i say we, but i think i actually mean mainstream America, and maybe what i actually mean to say is that i'm the one not-so-silently judging said group.  maybe this is hitting a nerve in all (read: both) of my readers.  maybe you're the ones that quietly judge people silly people like me (who started to teach patience to a six month old at mealtime) and i'm silently judging people like you because your similarly-aged child is throwing food and screaming at the local taco joint where we're having a nice family dinner (sans food fight).

well.  no matter what your parenting philosophy.  parenting is such. hard. work.  isn't it?  i think i've developed much thicker skin and deeper patience over this past year or so than i've ever had to my whole life.  and i have this feeling that i'm still just at the beginning.  i'm kind of holding my breath for when the fit hits the shan and my sweet little boy actually starts going through the official terrible two's, and i wonder how i'll feel about this all in the thick of it.  maybe i'm just naive right now.

anyway, i understand that any potential criticism regarding parenting is very touchy, and so i hope you're still my friends after this post.

lovelove,
philosophical parent