new normal

no one ever told me how fast they grow up.  just kidding, everyone says that.  all the time.  'cherish these days, they're never this small again,' they say with a nostalgic look in their eyes.  up until yesterday, i was actually so glad that Moses would never be this small again.  Mo's newborn phase was dreadful.  he was so unhappy and so sleepy and so gassy and so unpredictable.  i wanted to die.  i couldn't wait until he grew out of it.

well, yesterday, i realized what a sweet and delightful baby Mo has turned into and i wished for the first time in his life that we could keep him this small and pure forever.  he coos and smiles and looks around and is the very embodiment of joy.  

along with this lovely realization is that he just keeps changing all the time.  just as i think i know his schedule, he changes it up.  new normal: he doesn't sleep more than 1.5 hours at a time.  new normal: he wakes up and talks to himself at 4 am everyday.  new normal: he wants to sit up all the time, even though he still can't on his own.  almost did a face plant into the bathwater today.  new normal: dropped our dream feed; my body is adjusting, though not as quickly as i wish, ouch!  new normal: he can blow through size 4 diapers.  size 4!  he's five months old!  

today i walked into his room and he was already awake from his nap and trying desperately to look at the ceiling over his shoulder (he was sleeping on his belly).  i'd never seen him do that.  maybe this desire to look at the ceiling will entice him to figure out how to roll over on his own.  i feel like my life will be so much better once he figures that out.

love, 

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